Saturday, March 20, 2010
So.....tired...
So, the bliss of Kyler making the transition to his toddler bed only lasted one week. THIS week has been the longest week of my life. Kyler has stopped taking naps and has been waking up several times at night, and it takes FOREVER to get him to go back to sleep. We started doing the silent return to sleep method suggested in "Healthy sleep habits happy child" and nights are starting to get a bit better, but naps are still a nightmare. I end up spending two whole hours walking him back to his bed! The book says that 90 % of kids are still taking naps at his age, I just wondered what everyone thought. I added a poll in the right column to see if I just need to work harder, or is it really more common for kids this age to be napless. Also, any suggestions would be welcome! :)
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6 comments:
Hopefully it will get better soon. My two year old stopped taking naps when the twins were born, I was so sad. But she has started taking them again. I think I was so busy with the babies that I wasn't making sure she was getting one everyday. I bet it is just temporary with the new transition, GOOD LUCK!
Peter was a perfect sleeper until we switched him out of the crib. He is almost three now, and we have had at least 6 months of AVOIDING naps because they KILL bedtime. It is a hard, hard stage because he really does need more sleep. But unless he takes his nap at 9:00 in the morning, even a 20 minute doze during the day seems to guarantee an extra 2-3 hours at bedtime. Ammon was never a good nap taker and his schedule was always crazy and spuratic so my experience with him his not helpful in the least. Sorry - I hope you find a solution you are happy with. I know of a lot of people who do "quiet time" even when their children quit sleeping during the day.
Lock 'em in (put a child proof doorknob on the inside of their door). I know it sounds terrible, but it worked for both of my kids. Give them 1 chance and if they come out again, they get "the lock". Tanner hates the lock and that was enough for him and he'd say in. No guarantees they will go to sleep right away but eventually they would fall asleep. This is our threat for putting them to bed at night too.
Or....if he falls asleep in the car, take him for a drive every afternoon. Occasionally if Tanner is really tired he'll fall asleep watching a movie.
Good luck.....transitioning to a big boy bed and potty training are the 2 hardest parts of parenting. I hate both of them!
Amalie stopped as soon as we took her binki away. It ended up being better to not have to fight the nap than try to get her to take one.
One thing that did work for a while was saying, "It's nap time" and putting her in bed. Then the SECOND her foot hit the floor "Nap time" The SECOND her foot hit the floor "Nap" Then silently doing the same thing when she tried to get out. Finally she gave up.
Now she won't get out of bed for anything... kindof annoying sometimes. Now I can tell her when she needs to take a nap for a special reason and she usually will.
It ebbs and flows. It seems like there's always some undesirable sleep occurrence that's creeping in. Either one isn't napping, the other one is getting up 45 minutes earlier than usual, someone's waking up a couple times at night for no good reason... always something. But it always passes too, and we'll go for a couple of weeks with a great stretch of "normal" sleeping behavior and then something else kicks in. It just ebbs and flows and we roll with it.
It's so hard to let go of naps! Kyler is way young to do this on a permanent basis probably, but James will go for a few days or even a week with no nap sometimes. The thing that I'm SO glad we've taught them to do is that even if they don't nap they still have a resting time-- we call it their "break." Even if they're not napping, they still get tired-- you can tell. I put them in their rooms (with all the appropriate pre-nap fanfare, books, rocking for a few minutes, etc.) with a gate up or one of the toddler-proof door knob covers so they stay in their room. But I make sure they have all sorts of things to do that they can be reasonably expected to be engaged in by themselves for maybe 45 minutes. For James this means some new toys every once in a while and to rotate our building store of toys so that they don't get bored with what they have. As an added incentive, my kids never get fruit snacks, even though they LOVE them. One day I had some and let Ellen have a pack with a promise that she would "have a good break." And now it's become a tradition-- they get a packet of fruit snacks for their break. I think this provides not only a treat incentive but an element of routine and tradition that is a landmark for them in the day, and helps them know it's time to transition into their break time.
Anyway, this "break" time habit has been great because your kids will always grow out of needing naps at some point, but if they can be taught to be a little bit autonomous for at least a little chunk of time, you still get to have a little time to regroup and have a break yourself. I know I need it!!!
Now I don't really care if James or Ellen takes a nap or not, because I know he had some unwinding time, and I got some too.
Prepare yourself for a long comment...
Katie went through a transition period from about 2 1/2 to 3 1/2 where she didn't necessarily NEED a nap EVERY day. At first, we just skipped about one a week. Gradually it progressed to every other day, then maybe to two a week, and finally to no naps. At first, we skipped naps on days that I needed to run lots of errands, and it gave me a chance to pack a lunch and stay out longer. That was nice. It also made it so that our routine stayed the same. When we were home, Katie had to take a nap. Period.
I second (or third) the motion about doorknob locks/baby gates at nap time/bed time. On the days where they're deliriously tired, irrational, and resisting sleep with all their might, they need immediate boundaries so that they know Mommy is serious. If they can't get out, eventually, they get bored with trying and succumb to sleep.
I do highly recommend having quiet time on days where you're at home and Kyler's old enough that he's not deliriously tired in the afternoon. I wish I had done this with Katie. It will come in handy when Kyler's older and you need some alone time, for whatever reason. Then you can send him to his room for quiet time without him feeling like he's being punished. I like Jayne's idea of a routine. When the time comes, find something that works for you and Kyler and STICK WITH IT!!!
Remember, you're the best judge of your child. If Kyler is still tired and cranky in the afternoon, and if he still goes to bed well when he has a nap, then he probably still needs one every day. If not, then alter your game plan. The most important thing is consistency. If you let him get away with no nap when he really needs one, he'll fight you longer and harder the next time. If he knows he's not going to win the battle, he'll give up more easily. Routine is the key to many things for kids this age. Remember--consistency, consistency, consistency. It pays off. Good luck!!!
(And Tara steps down from her soap box.) :)
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